The Episode of the Broken Chair

The untold story you all have been waiting for to read and I have been waiting to tell!

Well, here it goes. I must mention that what I am about to share with you is a true life incident and this is a hearsay account of my mum and grandmom. Therefore, I am personally not a party to the incident.

One day, when I was seated in the hall with my mom and grandmom, they started talking about what happened that day. The following is the narrated indirect speech report of what was told to me (with my usual masala to make it sound like an interesting story not affecting the very essence of the story)

The morning began with its usual routine of my mom and grandmom getting up in the morning, preparing breakfast and going about other chores. I as usual went to college, during which time, something had happened.

My servant lady, Anjala (whom my dad fondly calls Angelina Jolie! Hehe!) comes home around 11 am or so. While entering the house, she notices a broken or battered chair made of steel with a bamboo strewn seat (you know the ones you would see in offices in earlier days) kept INSIDE OUR GARDEN AREA near the compound wall!! (I mean, the small stretch around our house where we do some plantation carefully administered by mom) We lock the gates every night and whoever gets up first, opens the lock in the morning and collects the milk packets hanging on it. My mom did the same old thing that day but DID NOT notice THIS CHAIR! But my dear Angelina, oops Anjala, saw it and immediately reported it to my mum. Now all the ladies in the house were like “What the hell is a BROKEN CHAIR doing INSIDE and how did it get in considering we LOCK the gate?” So there emerged the case of the mystery chair.

Finally, after much contemplation, they inferred that the chair was lifted up and deposited inside (Our wall is not very high) by SOMEONE! (Let me call that someone, X) Now guys, tell me. Why do you think X would place it inside our house?? for safe custody of stolen material? X was too tired carrying it? thought our house was some kind of go-down/garage? Well, as you know that an idle mind is a devil’s worshop, so you can invent as many reasons as possible. Now as the women were discussing this very exciting development in our otherwise routine-domestic lives, my dear maid expressed her desire. She wished to sell the chair since she did not foresee any person to come and claim ownership (Commerce students would know the whole right of bailer/bailee crap which we find so irritating to study but which any person of common sense would understand and my maid has plenty of sense :) ) So she prolly picked up the chair (the exciting object of which I did not have the opportunity to see with my very own eyes :(, I know, sad) anyway, I’ll continue, she prolly picked up the chair and went to sell it off (My mom said that since it was made of iron/steel, she would be able to fetch some price for the metal)

My dear Anjala having left, the SOMEONE, yes right, people, X appeared from nowhere. Oh, let me correct myself, the SOMEONES came, the Xs, yes! there appeared two young gentlemen (just giving them respect) I guess after making uncalled-for-search in our premises and realizing that their exercise was in vain rang the bell and asked my mom for the CHAIR ! (The following conversation is a translation from Tamil)

My mom in her indomitable style replied: “Chair! What chair??”

The gentlemen: “Aunty, the chair! We kept a chair here!! Where is the chair??”

Mom: “Why the hell did you keep a chair inside?? You think our house is some kind of a go-down for you to come along and dump anything you want?? I don’t know ANYTHING about your CHAIR!!

Gentlemen: “Please, aunty, please. Please tell us where the chair is!”

Mom: “I don’t know anything about your chair! Now please leave us alone and we have no idea about your stupid chair”

The gentlemen then left feeling highly disappointed.

My mom and grandmom were for a moment in a complete disbelief at what had transpired. After that, they just laughed over it and updated Anjala on the developments. As far as Anjala is concerned, she sold the chair, the earnings of which I’m not aware of! :(

I think this is the right time to tell you of another incident which happened a few weeks back along the same lines. My intriguing Anjala discovered two men shirts (of good quality) folded and lying outside our house. (I must say that Anjala has remarkably high observing and discovering capabilities) This time also, she disposed of the shirts.

This calls for some serious thinking now. WHY IN GOD’S NAME ARE PEOPLE DEPOSITING THEIR BELONGINGS IN OUR PREMISES?? It almost prompted me to make a thorough analysis of my house’s exterior whether it looks like some kind of safe custody agency/ go-down/ second-hand market. But my common sense put sense in me that my house, in fact, DID NOT look like any of the above! My home is a normal home like any other, I’m serious!

So if you can find any possible reason for the occurrence of such happenings, you are free to give your inferences except for the inference that it was just plain COINCIDENCE!

Till date, we don’t know who those people are and why they perform such activities. They were and have remained anonymous.